Thursday, February 7, 2008

25 times 24 words per film equals...

I'll soon be posting the 25th entry in the 24 words per film series and I'm interested to know if anybody out there has any thoughts, suggestions, complaints or hyperbolic praise about the series in general. Toss me a comment if you have anything to say.

Also, here are links to the 6th-15th entries in the series, for you archivists.

#15: Reign On Me, #14: The Last Winter, #13: The Lookout, #12: Brothers in the Head,
#11: Disturbia, #10: Halloween (2007), #9: Mutual Appreciation, #8: The Astronaut Farmer,
#7: Greedy, #6: The Hamiltons.


Jonathan Lapper said...

Dear lord it's a deluge of posts! I knew once I saw your comment on Scanners you had to be in virtual town. I commented back about your realist approach (damn you) so check it out. Now with this many posts dare I ask - Are you back online again or is this another Whole Foods post?

Ed Hardy, Jr. said...

Jonathan: I've got a new next door neighbor and he apparently has a non-password protected Wi-Fi account, bless his heart. So, until he gets wise or decides to stop being a good Samaritan, I'm back online.

Jonathan Lapper said...

Damn, I wish I had a neighbor like that. Don't worry, I won't say a word.

Burbanked said...

You can mark me in the "hyperbolic praise" column for this terrific series. That you can cram a cogent criticism (ah, alliteration)into that tight of a space never ceases to impress and amaze me. I love to write, but clear-minded brevity is not among my strengths.

Ed Hardy, Jr. said...

Burbanked: Gee yer swell! Thanks for the kind words. At times I have thought the series was in danger of becoming a dumping ground for films I'd seen that I didn't have anything to say about. But mostly it is a wonderful challenge to squeeze my essential thoughts on the matter into exactly 24 words.

Jonathan Lapper said...

Ed Hardy, jr: You heard of this thing, full length movie reviews?

Jonathan: Yeah, sure.

Ed Hardy, jr: Yeah, this is going to blow that right out of the water. Listen to this: 24 words per film.

Jonathan: Right. Yes. OK, all right. I see where you're going.

Ed Hardy, jr: Think about it. You walk into a video store, you see full length reviews sittin' there, there's 24 words per film right beside it. Which one are you gonna pick, man?

Jonathan: I would go for the 24.

Ed Hardy, jr: Bingo, man, bingo. 24 words per film. And we guarantee just as good a review as the full review folks.

Jonathan: You guarantee it? That's - how do you do that?

Ed Hardy, jr: If you're not happy with the first 24 words, we're gonna send you the extra word free. You see? That's it. That's our motto. That's where we're comin' from. That's from "A" to "B".

Jonathan: That's right. That's - that's good. That's good. Unless, of course, somebody comes up with 23 words per film. Then you're in trouble, huh?

[Ed Hardy, jr convulses]
Ed Hardy, jr: No! No, no, not 23! I said 24. Nobody's comin' up with 23. Who writes a review in 23 words? You won't even get your heart goin, not even a mouse on a wheel.

Jonathan: That - good point.

Ed Hardy, jr: 24's the key number here. Think about it. 24 hours a day. 24 doors. 24, man, that's the number. 24 chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tale from the sea. It's like you're dreamin' about Gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly Brie time, baby. Step into my office.

Jonathan: Why?

Ed Hardy, jr: 'Cause you're fuckin' fired!